At some point in our lives, we have all experienced some form of rejection. Some of us even have a strong fear of rejection and try to avoid it when at all possible. This is because we usually interpret rejection to mean that something is inherently wrong with us. If the person we’re attracted to doesn’t feel the same way towards us, we feel rejected. We wonder what’s wrong with us. We wonder why we weren’t good enough. If you don’t get the job or promotion you were vying for, again you may feel rejected. You may feel like you weren’t smart enough or good enough. But is that really the case?
A few weeks ago I was talking to a young teen named Karen* about peer pressure. Karen mentioned that sometimes she does things that she knows are wrong so that the other teens at school won’t think she’s boring. Karen and I had a long talk, but one of the things I told her was that there are 7.5 billion people on this planet, so there’s a very high probability that she will run into plenty of people who well definitely find her boring. You just have to learn to be okay with that. Because guess what, on the flip side of that, there will also be plenty of other people who will find her exciting and fascinating- anything but boring. Those are your people. You won’t be for everyone and everyone won’t be for you, and that’s absolutely okay!
Rejection gets such a bad rap but it really shouldn’t be viewed as a bad thing. In fact, it can actually be a good thing if you simply look at rejection as redirection to something else- something better. We often find ourselves wanting to plan out every single aspect of our life down to the tiny details and we don’t want to veer from that. Sometimes we get so focused and attached to one particular idea, thing, or person that we forget what our ultimate goal and purpose is in life. We forget that there’s more than one way to reach those goals. You have to be flexible and adaptable, which includes welcoming rejection when it comes. Rejection is a guide used to redirect you and keep you on track to what is meant for you. You never know what you are being protected from or what you are being guided towards when you face rejection or when things don’t work out how you wanted them to.
Even with knowing this, rejection can still be disappointing, especially when we have a lot of time, energy, or feelings invested. It’s okay (and helpful) to allow yourself to feel those emotions, but don’t stay there too long! Changing your view of rejection can really make things a lot easier to digest and bounce back from. It can also help keep you focused on what your ultimate goal(s) are and what’s most important to you in your life. This way you don’t get too discouraged and give up when you face rejection. Instead, you accept what isn’t and you continue to move forward because you know you’re simply being redirected to the path meant for you.
Can you think of a time in your life when you were rejected/redirected to something better? Let me know in the comments!! I want to hear for you.